Adrianne Cobb

Adrianne Cobb was 18. She died Saturday night. She was shot while she was at a party for teens. The crowd was predominantly made up of kids because it was a "No ID required" party. There was no alcohol. The main entertainment was music and dancing. I know this because one of the young men that my husband I have tutored for years was standing next to Adrianne when she was shot. Robert is living with us right now and I've spent the last week watching him process Adrianne's death in the ways that make sense to him. When I went to bed last night, he was sitting at the computer trying to make a slide show with pictures of her. He's on MySpace a lot, seeing what people are saying about the tragedy, looking at pictures of her - one of them together in a classroom. I didn't know Adrianne. My only memory of her was at Senior Day a few weeks ago, when she received a few awards from the B.T.W. High School staff. A few days later, Adrianne graduated. So that's all I know. But apparently, she was pretty unforgettable. Robert says she was hilarious - not just a class clown, but a school clown - making everyone laugh, including the principal. But she was also smart, and probably would have gone on to college.

Adrianne spent a lot of time at Streets Ministries, and I know everyone there is mourning her loss. She was also a relative of a recent Jobs for Life graduate, and Advance wanted to remember her as well. Because the truth is that not enough people are noticing this tragedy. As far as I could tell, nothing about her death, or the crime surrounding it, appeared in the Commercial Appeal - other than her obituary. I did see one brief mention that was included on a local news show, but it was wrapped up with a list of things that happened last weekend. There was no outrage over Adrianne's death.

There should be outrage. There should be a response. I don't know what that response should be...maybe just more people intentionally using their time to pour the love of Christ into the lives of their neighbors. Because we could use some more love down here.

Kate Lareau
kate@advancememphis.org

“Real Talk” and Real, Broken Leadership

This morning I was struck in the gut, again, by what it means to be a leader. With every JFL class that comes through, we always take a good piece of class time and dedicate it to telling life stories. This time around, Andrew boldly led off yesterday morning with an open, honest rendering of his journey. He almost brings me to tears each time I hear him tell it, and I think I am on round five. The rest of the class finished what he started and left me weepy-eyed. It wasn’t just that so many folks have experienced great amounts of heart-wrenching pain. It was that they were so honest about what they had been through. And it wasn’t just honesty about the things that happened to them, although there were many of those stories. It was also honesty about addictions, broken family relationships, poor choices, and deep regrets.

Today, as we continued life stories, it was the same deal. But it was my turn to get us kicked off. Because of the searing honesty of those who have gone before me, I went for it. I told my life story in a more raw, open, and honest fashion than I ever have done in a public setting. I shared things with the class that only a small handful of people even know about me. I had to choke back tears for the whole ten minutes I spoke. It was humiliating, difficult, scary, and freeing.

But it didn’t end there. Person after person followed me and poured out their most secret pains, showed their deepest wounds, and confessed brokenness in their own lives. Even as I write this, it is hard to keep from weeping.

True leadership, true discipleship, true gospel living can only happen in a context of vulnerability and brokenness. I deeply believe that people were open this morning because I laid it all on the table first. But, I could only do that because Andrew and other class members had been so honest and broken the previous day. The LORD does beautiful things when broken people are “real” with one another. He begins to bring healing; He brings community; He teaches us to love. If we, The Church, and we, the individuals in the church, want to see change in our world we must begin clinging to God’s promise that “the first will be last.” That means making ourselves last.

Where I come from you don’t win friends, you don’t win influence, and you certainly don’t win respect by airing your dirty laundry. But that is where the Gospel thrives! Instead of trying to hammer legalistic rules, or even a message of grace, into people’s heads and hearts, we need to tell our story. We need to be non-threatening, grace-filled, and honest. We need to tell the full story of the Gospel in our own lives. That is the grace, that is the beauty, that is the message that draws people to Jesus. Only when we let people see the full picture of sin, grace, redemption, and restoration in our own lives will we lead people to fully worship The King. Real leadership is broken leadership.

Brandon Russell

Brandon@advancememphis.org

In His Own Words: Dewayne's Story

A year ago this week, Dewayne Ghoston became a Christian. This is his story.

I was raised in a house of four sisters and a single parent mom. My father was an addict on crack back in the 80's when it first hit the south. I've seen my mom being abused many times so as for me coming up I vow to myself that I'll never put my hands on a lady. Seeing my mom always struggling growing up I promised my mom that I was going to get us out of the projects (hood, ghetto). As I got older I realized that I completely underestimated how hard that was to do. Later on around the age of twelve, I was first introduced to marijuana through an uncle. Sometime later at the age of fifteen or sixteen, I first tried selling it but didn't know how to manage my money so that didn't last long. By being in the streets I learned to become a professional thief including selling drugs on the streets. In so many words, I became a slave to MONEY. I've destroyed many lives of others yet at the same time I was destroying my soul.

I was really confused at this point in my life. I was in and out my mom's house because she wasn't tolerating me running the streets while living under her roof. So feeling rejected I began to hide behind my emotions by robbing throughout my community. A bunch of people wanted me dead so at all times and most places I carried a gun for safety. The age of 18 I picked the drugs back up and learned the drug game. I went by the name "Ghost" on the streets, which meant "can't nobody see me (touch me)." In other words I thought I was God. By me being in and out of jail that became a third home for me.

The previous time I was incarcerated I began to open my eyes to life after I received information on my sister being robbed at gun point. Of course I was hurt by the fact I wasn't there to protect her. Here, at this point in life, I finally felt as God was trying to tell me to slow down. Eleven months later they decided to release me. My focus was on doing whatever I could possibly do to stay out of harms way. I started my search of a job and after getting rejected dozens of times I began to sink in discouragement. Weeks later I discovered an organization called "Advance Memphis" which focuses on furthering adult education. Going through the programs I was introduced to the gospel in a different form which led me to realize how broken and in need of a savior I was. On June 8th in the year 2009 I confessed to Christ that I trusted and believed that he is the song of God, repented on my sins and asked him to save me and to take me as I am.

Since then I can honestly say that the Lord has changed me. He has transformed my heart and renewed my mind with the desires to wanting to serve him instead of chasing after worldly desires. In conclusion the reason why I'm seeking this position is because it's a great opportunity to serve God's Kingdom making Christ known while also growing closer to him through my experiences of offering my body to him as a living sacrifice.

PS Thanks for taking the time out to allow me to share the majority of my testimony which led me to Christ with you.

Dewayne Ghoston

A Brief Response to the New York Times Article

If you're a Memphian and haven't yet read "The New Poor: Blacks in Memphis Lose Decades of Economic Gains," then you should do so. But after you do, there are a couple things we want to tell you.

First, we want you to know that despite the injustice and poverty present in Memphis, Advance Memphis is seeing unemployed and low-income Memphians FIND HOPE. We see this in many ways, but this week hope came in the form of an internal report on the status of our Mercy Loans. We use Mercy Loans to help graduates avert a crisis; they help graduates avoid check cashing loans and other usorious options. Of 18 loans issued this year, 13 have already been repaid. Of the remaining 5, only 2 are in default; 3 are active and in good standing. People in the poorest urban zip code in Tennessee are repaying loans (and saving for assets, see below).

Second, we want you to know that you can join us in supporting CHANGE in Memphis. Residents of the poorest urban zip code in Tennessee are working to improve their educations, find jobs, save for assets, and become economically independent. Contributing to Advance provides job readiness and workforce development for neighborhood residents. It provides GED tutoring, employment options, budget counseling and more. Contributing specifically to our IDA Program provides matching dollars for savings accounts used to purchase capacity building assets (below, see Darlene Gandy with the car she purchased through the IDA Program.)

Psalm 82:3-4 (The Message)
"Enough! You've corrupted justice long enough, you've let the wicked get away with murder. You're here to defend the defenseless, to make sure that underdogs get a fair break; Your job is to stand up for the powerless, and prosecute all those who exploit them."

Neighbors

A neighbor brought my family some groceries earlier this week. We weren't lacking food, she just thought she would help us out a bit. It's not uncommon for her to drop by to talk, drop off a pot of chili or some tasty dessert. This time was a little different. She shared a story with my wife. When she was younger she hit hard times as a single mom with her first baby. Food almost seemed like a luxury. She told Lily (my wife) how she used to just pray and pray that her baby would keep sleeping, because if he woke up he would want to eat and her cupboards were all but empty. As a parent of a toddler, I can't imagine how hopeless and painful that must be. Her first night in public housing was one of the rough ones--nothing to eat. But thankfully, one of her neighbors stopped by and invited them to dinner. To hear her tell it, it was an angel! And given the circumstances, I think that thoughtful neighbor did show the love of God in a tangible way, like an angel. That night, she made a vow to God that she would always be good to her neighbors. And I am willing to testify as well as others in our building that she is indeed making good on that.

When Lily told me about this conversation, I cried. I was overwhelmed by this sweet lady's care for others amidst a still hard life (both she and her mom have substantial health problems). I am also convicted. How many ways do I fail to be a neighbor to those around me? How much more do I fail to be a neighbor to those that I don't come across on a daily basis, those folks I avoid? The amazing thing is that I have even greater reason to be grateful than my neighbor. I have never felt the awful hopelessness of not being able to feed my child, my wife, or myself. I have been blessed with access to all the necessities (and many luxuries) as well as a strong social support system that would readily and quickly provide anything I lacked.

Why don't I feel the same gut level gratefulness for God's blessings that my neighbor does? In fact, why doesn't the church feel that level of compassion? Why don't all of us who follow Jesus have deeper gratefulness for all the LORD has given us and seek to spread that blessing to others? Sometimes I think we might look like Israel did, called to be a blessing to the nations, and not only failing in our charge, but also failing to understand how blessed we really are. The LORD has used this sweet lady not only to bring blessing in my family's life, but conviction and a better understanding of how we should go about building his Kingdom.

Brandon Russell
brandon@advancememphis.org